The Cup of Kindness – Part Two

 

 

Part two in a two-part series inspired by the classic New Year’s song, Auld Lang Syne. Find the first post here.

“And we’ll take a cup o’ kindness yet, for auld lang syne.” ~ Robert Burns

In Part One, we talked about drinking deeply from the “cup of kindness”—a stockpile of all the positive, supportive, or thankful things people said to us last year—in order to fortify our confidence for the months ahead.

Now, before the year gets too far along, let’s start keeping track of all the new encouragement that comes to us, so we can always have it at our fingertips. I know from personal experience that even if I take the time to save the nice things people say, I don’t always go back and read them; so let’s find the good stuff, archive it, and make it easy to read.

…After we clear something up.

Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never brought to mind ?

“Wait a minute,” you might be thinking, “if I collect praise about me, doesn’t that make me conceited?”

Chances are, you received gifts last year—on your birthday, over the holidays, or just because. And, for the most part, you probably enjoyed them.

When someone gives you compliments, thanks, or praise, they do it because they want you to hear it. They’re giving you a gift with their words. Unless you return it or give it away (“Oh, I can’t take the praise for the Spielberg account, Bob was the one who handled that”), then you either make it a part of your life, or stuff it in a closet. Only one of those is how the gift was intended.

We honor the giver when we delight in the gift.

Pick the daisies fine

As you compile your cup o’ kindness this year, some sources will be easy to see: E-mail, cards, notes, Twitter @s, instant messages, a handshake and spoken word of thanks. But don’t forget to watch for the subtle gifts—like a hurried “Dinner was great” remark, as a teenager ducks out the door; the “XO” on the shopping list from your sweetie; or the new client who says, “So-and-so recommended you.”

Every little bit matters. Because it shows you mattered to someone.

And give us a hand…

Okay, so now that you’ve started a collection of kindness, how do you manage it so it doesn’t get lost in the shuffle?

You may relate to different methods, but here are a few of mine to get you started:

* Journal: Start your year off right with a large, blank journal or sketchbook that has acid-free pages (so the paper won’t yellow over time). Write about the encouragement you receive; tape notes and cards onto the pages; print out e-mails and glue them in. Pluses: You create a tangible, beautiful memento that can be enjoyed for generations. Minuses: Time-consuming, which makes it difficult to keep up with archiving feedback.

* Google Documents: I use GDocs for most of my writing, so I started keeping track of feedback there, too. Pluses: Web-based, folder organization, benefit of Google search, intuitive Word-style interface & hotkeys. Minuses: Pasted images only last as long as they’re hosted on original sites. Inaccessible without internet connection.

* Word processor: Store files on your computer or a portable flash drive. Pluses: Folder organization. Images remain even if source page is deleted. Minuses: No internet access. Time-consuming to transcribe/save items.

* Tumbleblog: If you’re a businessperson, why not track feedback where all the world can see it?…As long as the praise is public (such as a Twitter @) or you get permission from the giver, that is. You can make a specialized Tumblr account; for example, as a writer, I started one to keep track of the good things people have to say about our upcoming novel series. Pluses: Web-based, post from e-mail & phone, privacy settings. Minuses: No offline access.

I’m going to dedicate the rest of this section to Evernote.com, because I have a feeling this is the most useful tool of all for me. With Evernote, you can:

* Highlight and clip text and photos from web pages
* Send e-mails, text messages, and Twitter posts to your archive
* Snap photos with a phone on the fly and send them to Evernote via text
* Write new notes
* Upload photos from your computer
* Tag, track, and organize your saved items.
* Search for notes and photos by keyword or Evernote’s text recognition feature (yes, it even recognizes handwriting)
* Use Evernote via online access or desktop/offline access.

Unless you opt for a paid upgrade, Evernote provides these services for free. (Don’t forget, when using your phone, your carrier’s regular text charges apply.)

Whatever method you choose, consider adding encouragement from one other person: yourself.

* Save quotes, verses, writing, or pictures you find inspiring.
* Write notes about what you achieved every day. Whether you landed a million-dollar account at work, or a won a priceless smile from a child, you did good today. Write it down, and read it often.

Bring to mind the inspiration from your “days gone by,” and it will motivate you to make tomorrow even better.

 

Take it a step further…
Don’t forget the Golden Rule! Give the praise and recognition you desire to others. Tell Bob he did a great job on the Spielberg account. Add a love note to your sweetie’s to-do list. And why not tell your parents they made some pretty awesome dinners back in “auld lang syne”? It’s never too late! ~Christine

 

Photo above, “Monsoon in a Mug,” by elvispayne / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

 

© 2010 mousewords

Have Confidence in You!

 



Soaring by StacyJMT, originally uploaded by StacyJMT.

 

In The Sound of Music, Julie Andrews’ character sang a rousing pep-talk to herself in an effort to boost her self-confidence. We can do the same. Taking a cue from the lyrics to “I Have Confidence,” we can follow the character’s example and build our sense of self-worth—proving to ourselves that we are capable of achieving more than we think we can.

“I must dream of the things I am seeking”

How you see yourself goes a long way toward influencing what you become. Imagine the person you want to be—play it over and over in your mind, like a movie. If you have a hard time visualizing, try writing down the qualities you desire. Start each item with “I am…” not “I want to be…” Tell yourself you are, and you will become that.

“And while I show them I’ll show me!”

Action gives birth to confidence. Are you afraid to do something on your goal list? Then do it. The knowledge that you faced your fear will encourage you—and you’ll discover that you can achieve your dreams. That sense of accomplishment will make your confidence soar.

“With each step I am more certain”

The more you realize your progress, the more confident you will feel. Track your progress—have good pictures taken of yourself, and look at them daily. If possible, put examples of your work, thoughts, or projects online, such as in a blog, photo hosting account, or group forum. Seeing your work onscreen and receiving positive feedback from others will do wonders for your sense of self-worth.

When someone gives you encouragement, print it out or write it down, and look at it often. Drive it into your mind that you are good, you are worthy, and you can do whatever you set your mind on.

Think that sounds conceited? It’s not—it’s edification, and it’s essential. You would do it for others—give yourself the same kindness.

“Besides what you see I have confidence in me!”

Look the part. Invest in a good hair cut. Buy clothing, accessories, or cosmetics that make you feel good. Don’t think you can afford it? The truth is, you can’t afford not to spend money on your image. Work it into your budget, if you need to, but do not scrimp in this department.

Spending money on your image is as viable an investment as putting it into office supplies or business cards. If a $40 trip to the stylist makes you feel like a million bucks, that’s a good return on your investment.

“Wake up! It’s healthy!”

A fast way towards feeling confident is to exercise regularly—not only is it good for you, strenuous exercise also causes your body to manufacture endorphins, chemicals which actually produce a pleasurable sense of well-being. According to Wikipedia, they’re released during exercise, excitement—and orgasm. Think that will get you to exercise?

“I have confidence in confidence alone!”

A wise adage urges us to act as if we have already received what we want, even before we receive it. If you act confident, you’ll feel confident.

Stand up straight, put your shoulders back, keep your chin up. That alone gives a sense of stability. Speak firmly. Breathe. Relax. Think of all the steps you have taken to boost your confidence, remember the progress you have already made, and take the next step forward. You can do it.

I have confidence in you.

 

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A Sign for the Times

No Parking

I have a lot of ideas. A plethora of them.

Sometimes these ideas cram together in my noggin until I’m certain they’ll be pouring out my ears. Most often it’s “good” ideas–story plots, art projects, web design plans, goals, wants, dreams, hopes, desires. Things I can do and be and say.

But there are stressful ideas, too–thoughts, really. The time frame I have in which to complete these projects. The magnitude of work that’s involved with them. The limitations of the resources I have at hand. My own lack of experience in certain matters.

What often winds up happening is that the overload of ideas and mounting stress cause me to clutch–I get stuck between having a ton of things to do, but not knowing how to do them all. The ideas and energy build up inside me, while I stand immobile. Imagine filling a pressure cooker with more pressure than it can handle–at some point, something’s gotta give.

Facing one of these moments yesterday, I decided to go for a nice long walk. Burn off some of that energy, clear my thinking. But I was delayed until it was too dark to walk very far; so, instead, I sprinted up and down the block.

Probably looks strange to passing motorists to see someone in jeans and a windbreaker running back and forth as if there were monsters on her heels, but I’ve long since given up worrying about looking strange.

As I ran, I was still thinking. The energy can be burned away, but the ideas remain. Tons and tons of thoughts, pouring through my mind. I puzzled over them, wondering to myself, How can I get all these things done? How can I do what I need to do?

And then I looked up in mid-sprint, and saw a road sign. It read:

“NO PARKING ANY TIME. BEGIN.”

Hit me like a blast of cold air. Keep running, keep moving. Let the energy and ideas pour out together. Just begin. Dive in and start working.

And don’t stop running.

You’ll get where you want to go.

It felt good to run; felt good to have the fresh air. I could have kept moving back and forth, back and forth, till I collapsed from exhaustion. But that’s the thing about running–you won’t get anywhere unless you have a destination in mind, a purpose. If you’re not running toward something specific, you’re merely burning energy.

So I plied my feet back toward the house. Back to my office room, back to my ideas. And I’m simply digging in.

No parking at any time.

Begin.

 

It Couldn’t Be Done

It Couldn’t Be Done
By Edgar Guest

Somebody said it couldn’t be done,
But he with a chuckle replied
That “maybe it couldn’t,” but he would be one
Who wouldn’t say so till he’d tried.
So he buckled right in with the trace of a grin
On his face. If he worried he hid it.
He started to sing and he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

Somebody scoffed: “Oh, you’ll never do that;
At least no one has ever done it”;
But he took off his coat and he took off his hat,
And the first thing we knew he’d begun it.
With a lift of his chin and a bit of a grin,
Without any doubting or quiddit,
He started to sing and he tackled the thing
That couldn’t be done, and he did it.

There are thousands to tell you it cannot be done,
There are thousands to prophesy failure;
There are thousands to point out to you, one by one,
The dangers that wait to assail you.
But just buckle in with a bit of a grin,
Just take off your coat and go to it;
Just start to sing as you tackle the thing
That “cannot be done,” and you’ll do it.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~

One of my favorite poems/writings of all time.  Just thought I’d share.  :) :)

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

 

“Jane and the Beanstalk” by a Friend

A friend of mine has written a wonderful blog with a beautiful metaphor. I’d love to share it with everyone!

 http://simpleblessings.blogspot.com/2007/11/jane-and-beanstalk.html

 Her blog is on my blogroll, and I enjoy checking in with her often to see what she has to say!